Fears Start Creeping in

This one goes out to all my fellow introverts out there that wish they were extroverts. Social anxiety has a lot of paranoia. Some people see someone they have not seen for a while and it brightens their day. When we see someone that we haven't seen for a while fears start creeping in.

The world is not out to get you. I know it seems like:
One wrong move and people hate you.
One sentence misunderstood can break you.
One stumble and you fall forever.
One wrong step you will never go the right direction again.

Many introverts hide their emotions under a week facade of not "caring" when really they care too much. We are sensitive thinkers. It's a stereotype that introverts read and stay home all the time. This is because it's easier to over think and obsess over characters of a book because there's no danger that those characters will judge you. We find a need to connect with people but have a fear of rejection.  We tend to over think things and relive the same mistakes over and over again.  We have a lot of internal monologue and say very little of it. Every time we walk outside it's like walking out on stage.

I know introverts that compensate by an over cavalier attitude and go out of their way to ruin their reputations. This is because they believe if they get rid of that social standard the fear will go away. It's very easy to gain the attitude that you "hate people" I have both heard and said this before. Truth is though that I love people. Like most bad things the root is miscommunication.  It's not knowing people's feelings that gets to us the most, and the hopelessness of the inability to find out.

I just want everyone to know with this post that you're not alone. I'm an introvert that's blessed with an understanding wife and wonderful friends. When I start overthinking things I can turn to them for support and my life is so much better than it was without them. Angela is my rock when my mind starts to wander and I really hope I'm hers as well. I tell all my friends that they can contact me when they start over thinking things because I know how bad it can get. A little reassurance goes a long way.