50th Blog! Q&A

I can hardly believe this is my fiftieth blog post and to celebrate this momentous occasion I asked people to send in questions to answer today. I got 4 really good questions that I'm excited to answer but before I get into that, Angela and I were hiking yesterday at Wildwood and for the first time someone approached us and complemented me on my blog! I am so honored and flattered that anyone reads this. It made me so happy that I can share our love with all of you, it truly made my day, thank you. :)

 Okay now with the wonderful questions.

1.       How did you meet?
Angela and I met at a swing dance class at Moorpark College.

 2.       How did you know that you were in love?  
My sense of self has grown through knowing Angela. She essentially started being the best part of me. It was more than just laughing and playing around our connection ran much deeper than I ever expected anyone's could. One day I came to the realization I wanted to make all of these small adventures one large one and that I need her with me forever. So I started making plans to make that happen.

 3.       What was your most memorable date?
I have to say my favorite date was when I randomly took Angela to a dark abandoned parking lot with a big flat wall and just started setting up, (I know it sounds creepy so far but stay with me here).  First, I got a fold out table from our trunk with a 50's table cloth. I set up the table with various snacks (taffy, popcorn, gummy bears, grapefruit gummy slices, peanuts, and others) all wrapped up in cute 50's snack bags. Then I took out drinks that had labels that said "Sean's Drive-in Theater" on them.  Then I brought out a poster board with a movie poster lined with taffy that I had taped on it. Then I brought out a battery backup, a projector, and a FM tuner to hook the movies sound to our car.  I had created a fully functional personal drive in movie theater.

4.       What is the most important aspect in building a relationship?
Well I'll have to pick two... patience and self-respect. Some people think that both patience and relaxation is unattainable. I mean how can you relax when something is important but not getting done!?! Most worry, get angry, or express themselves in some way so people know it's important. After all lack of communication is the route of most frustration. But resist the temptation to get desperate. If someone can't listen to you when your calm collective and reasonable chances are they are not going to lesson to you when you freak out. Also if you do need to freak out to get what you want that's not a good relationship.

OK that's all for this blog post, please remember to like comment and share I love hearing from all of you. :)

A Man Who Wants a Bridal Shower (Please don't judge me)

Weddings are a very personal commitment. When I got married I really wanted everything perfect for my bride to be. Now that she is my bride nothing has changed. When I showed interest in going to Angela's bridal shower I was told that someone else was throwing the shower and it would be rude to invite me. I was told it was normal for the groom not to be allowed to attend and it would be weird for me to show up (I'm sure it would have been). However now that I've grown up a bit I realize you have to set your own trends, times are consistently changing and things are only awkward if you let them be.

I've talked to a lot of women that have said they didn't want a co-ed shower because guys would get bored very quickly. I'm not like that and it would have been a dream come true to attend my wife's shower.  I would have even had a blast throwing it; after all these things only happen once in a lifetime. Some people are happy vicariously living though someone else, I just can't do that.

My wife and I go to things like Mary Kay parties and I'm tired of getting the same three reactions 1.Wow he's whipped, she must have made him come. 2. Can't he spend one night without his wife? He needs to grow up. Or 3. He must be gay.

I've never got "Hey he loves his wife and likes to put makeup on her face like a beautiful canvas". I can't tell you how many times I've face palmed when people say "It's nice you host girls night for your wife...."  or when I bring up that I wanted a bridal shower, "well you should have had a groom roast with all your bro's"

I host girls night with my wife because it's one of the many things we enjoy doing together. Next girls night we are going to have a bridal shower theme and I couldn't be more excited. I don't know anyone that fits exactly into "normal". I am impressed with my wife's ability to adapt and work with this odd disposition of mine. I try to stick up for her and be there whenever she needs me. I shouldn't keep score but honestly she does so much more for me that I feel inadequate.

I've had to weed out people in my life that look down on me or exclude me from things that I genuinely enjoy. Feeling left out is a horrible feeling but I would rather have people around me that want to include all of me. This being said I'm very lucky to have so many great friends. It's too bad simply because someone's born a girl or guy there are so many social rules against us.

My wife has really put herself out there every time she is invited to something that I'm not. Instead of leaving me behind and hanging out with people that don't like me she stands by me. I feel guilty to put my wife in this position especially because a lot of times this means social suicide for her. These selfless social martyrs don't go unnoticed by me. Again with this blog post I would like to raise awareness of how wonderful my wife is.

Fear Driven Fun

All of my dreams are coming true. I've always lived my life not to "lose", it never occurred to me that I could "win". I have a beautiful intelligent wife, a wonderful job, a great place to live, and a new car. I even host girl's night once a month and have wonderful friends... How did this happen?

My wife and I live our lives in a constant rush. If we are not at work we are doing something fun and if we're not doing something fun then we're planning our next fun thing. Our frame of mind is we are only young once and we want to experience all we can when we can. I have heard all growing up "stop and smell the roses" well now I'm starting to know the scope of what that means. Last night was one of the best nights of my life and consequently shattered my perception on everything... And we did... Ready for it?... Nothing.

I've always been of the opinion that it doesn't matter what you're doing as long as you're doing it with the right people. I thought taking time out of our busy schedule to appreciate the beauty of life meant adventure. It turns out adventure and relaxation are very different and I have much to learn. I've never been afraid to die but as it turns out I've always been way to afraid not to live. Any fear is not good even fear that's motivational. 

We have this problem where we book every weekend. I'm not saying being at Disneyland or taking road trips isn't amazing, it is. And as problems go, having too much fun is definitely the best one to have.  We just need to slow down. We are putting unnecessary stress on us out of fear; fear our lives are to short. I've gotten to the point though where my body will not let me sleep in. I'm living in the present always thinking about the future and the past. We need to unplug and disappear once in a while. Angela and I can afford to lose a day or two.

There is no silence in our lives right now. We are always talking about something, anything. I'm overwhelmed by fun things we have planned or plan on planning. Our lives are not simple anymore. I've heard "don't grow up because you will have too many responsibilities." I've always assumed that meant the fight to stay alive and a constant worry that all your dreams won't come true. I was wrong. Now I understand there is no fire and I am in no hurry. I have my wife and she has me. Sometimes living just means staring into each other's eyes and knowing you have each other is all that matters. 

Unlost Photography

Flower Chasing & Handmade Jewelry

One time when when there was thunder and lightning outside, Angela and I took to the streets and chased lightning all the way deep into the wilderness.  This weekend we decided to chase something a little less dangerous.. flowers, and it was so much fun! We took our friend Erika with us and drove to the Antelope Valley California Poppy Reserve. They had purple flowers that smelled like grape soda and an impressive display of poppies. And yes Angela did take that picture of poppies at the top of this post. :) We felt like we might be able to find more flowers if we were to drive around outside the reserve and we found so many more cool and beautiful things. Like this boat in the middle of nowhere I am now captain of.

On the next day, Angela and I went to an all ladies handmade jewelry and spray tan party. The jewelry there was dainty and beautiful. The party supported Tiny Loving Canines & all the shelter dogs. I have to say even the boxes the jewelry came in had cute little jeweled paw prints. :3 Since we went I've seen other guys trying to get invited to her later events. Anyone that knows me knows how diligently I strive to be accepted in the female community; I would like to thank Brittani Berman for inviting me despite it was an all female affair. The simple truth is that it’s a bad idea to invite a guy to a girl’s event. It’s a comfortable place that girls don’t have to worry about guys being bored by girl things, being judgmental, or trying to hit on you.

The party was a dream come true for me. Gems of Hope & Lexi's line of jewelry were so pretty! And everyone was so pleasant and agreeable. We made so many good new friends. It saddens me to think that the fact that I'm a guy might make me more trouble then I'm worth to invite to most of these events. Thank you so much for accepting me as the only exception to your party, even though other guys want to jump on that bandwagon now. The jewelry looked even better in person and I suggest that if anyone has not had a chance to see particularly Lexi's line should, you will not be disappointed.  Angela loves her new jewelry we picked out together and we could not be happier with the wonderful new friends we've made.

Check out Gems of Hope on Facebook and there website is www.mkt.com/gemsofhope and 15% goes to TLC and to help dogs get out of high kill shelters!

My First Bachelorette Party

Even now, something that with mixed company I don't lead a conversation with, is my love for getting my nails done or buying cute shoes for my wife. So I'm going out on a limb here to tell everyone that last night I attended my first bachelorette party, and it was so fun! When Angela and I received our invitations a month ago it made me very happy to be included and the invitation was so cute! It informed us that all the "party monsters" would be meeting up at a nice hotel, eating at a fun restaurant called Stacked and then back to the hotel for spa and truth or dare.

When we arrived at the hotel we played "have you ever" as an icebreaker. If you've never played this game its where you have to keep taking shots each time they mention something you have ever done, thus admitting to scandalous things. The bride to be does not drink alcohol so the drinks were replaced with bad tasting liquids like pure turmeric juice. The game was a good way to build camaraderie by sharing some dirty little secrets and gaining a common enemy in that darn juice!

When we left for Stacked we were given a scavenger hunt list of things like "get a guy to serenade the bride to be". One the girls went above and beyond on this one. She got 6 or 7 guys to sing As Long as You Love Me by the Backstreet Boys. Angela and I were very impressed. The toasted marshmallow milkshakes were amazing, and everyone was very social and lively.

We went into the spa had girl talk and again played have you ever until it got late and we were kicked out of the spa. The guy that came to kick us out said "OK ladies the pools closed" and then stared and watched each one of us get out of the pool. One of the girls when we got back to our room said "I bet he thought you are the luckiest dude". I was lucky, but not for any of the reasons that guy may have been thinking. Last night was a dream come true, I can't thank the bride enough for sharing her night with Angela and me.

Our Amazing Trip

Angela and I had a wonderful weekend. Even though Angela and I are together 24/7 it's nice for us to get away from responsibility and relax together. We left Friday night to visit the Grand Canyon and I have to tell you every part of our trip was enjoyable. I find it amazing how one on one time can really make one's heart grow fonder. Being able to shift more of my focus on my wife then my everyday routine was very welcome. We showed up at our hotel at about 4 in the morning and we were greeted by name. I asked "how did you know it was us?" and she responded "you two are the last to check in. Where were you?"

The hotel was very nice; we had our own fridge, WiFi password, heater, good parking, included breakfast, and Bath and Body Works soaps and shampoos. We were able to get good sleep before going to check out the national park. The scenery was beautiful; the clouds were perfect. We drove around from outlook to outlook and Angela would get out and take photos. I really enjoyed the quality time together, every place we went i felt we were standing on holy ground. I can't imagine heaven being better then looking out and seeing these breath taking views with my wife by my side.

After the sun went down, we went to Flagstaff to get supplies from Walmart. We got to try Blue Bell ice cream for the first time and it was creamy and delicious. In fact there was a lot of firsts on this trip it was Angela's first time to the Grand Canyon. That night it snowed a foot and we woke up to winter wonderland right outside our window. We wished we had brought an ice chest so we could have brought some snow home and and have a snowball fight with friends, but we did get to make a snowman.

Our trip may have only lasted a weekend but it was magical. I am so thankful that I have my wife that I can go on these adventures with. I get no greater joy then sharing my life with the one I love. We need to plan more of these weekend trips. I'm so glad we decided to just pick up and go. We had rain for 9 hours on our way home with no traffic. I know some of you hate driving in the rain but we loved every second of it. We even got to visit the London Bridge on our way home. :)

All photo credit for this post my amazing wife Angela if you like the photos please comment I'm trying to get her to realize how good she really is.