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Tuesday, March 17, 2015

Fear Driven Fun

All of my dreams are coming true. I've always lived my life not to "lose", it never occurred to me that I could "win". I have a beautiful intelligent wife, a wonderful job, a great place to live, and a new car. I even host girl's night once a month and have wonderful friends... How did this happen?

My wife and I live our lives in a constant rush. If we are not at work we are doing something fun and if we're not doing something fun then we're planning our next fun thing. Our frame of mind is we are only young once and we want to experience all we can when we can. I have heard all growing up "stop and smell the roses" well now I'm starting to know the scope of what that means. Last night was one of the best nights of my life and consequently shattered my perception on everything... And we did... Ready for it?... Nothing.

I've always been of the opinion that it doesn't matter what you're doing as long as you're doing it with the right people. I thought taking time out of our busy schedule to appreciate the beauty of life meant adventure. It turns out adventure and relaxation are very different and I have much to learn. I've never been afraid to die but as it turns out I've always been way to afraid not to live. Any fear is not good even fear that's motivational. 

We have this problem where we book every weekend. I'm not saying being at Disneyland or taking road trips isn't amazing, it is. And as problems go, having too much fun is definitely the best one to have.  We just need to slow down. We are putting unnecessary stress on us out of fear; fear our lives are to short. I've gotten to the point though where my body will not let me sleep in. I'm living in the present always thinking about the future and the past. We need to unplug and disappear once in a while. Angela and I can afford to lose a day or two.

There is no silence in our lives right now. We are always talking about something, anything. I'm overwhelmed by fun things we have planned or plan on planning. Our lives are not simple anymore. I've heard "don't grow up because you will have too many responsibilities." I've always assumed that meant the fight to stay alive and a constant worry that all your dreams won't come true. I was wrong. Now I understand there is no fire and I am in no hurry. I have my wife and she has me. Sometimes living just means staring into each other's eyes and knowing you have each other is all that matters. 

Unlost Photography

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