My Wife is Better Than Yours

A relationship is a living breathing entity. A flame fueled by uncontrollable desire. There is no wonder that romance is normally separated from the brain to the heart. I used to think this was because love is irrational, governed by hormones, and never to be understood by logical assertions. This is however not the case.

Who here reading this can say honestly that they feel passionately desired in their relationship?

I love Angela so much and I never want her to feel I'm taking her for granted.  It's a daily battle that is worth every second spent on it. Angela asked me last night with her puppy dog eyes "why are so many relationships falling apart around us?" I knew that she was not only sad for others but also afraid because she loves me so much and doesn't want to lose me. I replied, "They don't have one thing we have" which she asked "what is that?" I replied, "A GREAT BIG BUSHY BEARD!"

But her question did get me thinking. So to the men reading this: You need to make her feel desired. She wants to know you feel she's the best. And I'm not just talking about the best wife. I'm talking about the best mom, the best lover, the best looking, and the best at knowing your heart. If you say another woman is the "best" in any way she WILL notice. You may think "Oh, well I don't have a jealous woman this doesn't apply to me"-- IT DOES! It's not a jealousy thing it's not even a self-esteem thing. It's the way she connects herself to you. By showing her that you know she's the best makes her feel desired.

When is the last time your partner has shown or told you that you are special to them or cherished? 

Feeling desired is relationship oxygen. We need to feel the relationship, being married isn't enough. You have to prove that you're married every day. It's said that "true love is not found, it's built". Never stop building. Make clear your intentions to love your spouse forever and keep clarifying! This goes a long way. We all have anxiety and we all have fear but passion is a driving force. It keeps us going in a world that tends to pull us apart. When people don't feel desired in a relationship they start questioning why they are even in it. I never want our relationship to get to that point.

Surprise Date!

This is a guest post by my wife, Angela -

Yesterday I got to go out on a surprise date. The fact that I was going on a date wasn’t a surprise but the activity certainly was! Sadly for Seani I am really good at figuring out surprises even with almost no clues. Seani has to be super secretive about surprises or I can figure out what we’re doing by what kind of shoes I should wear and the direction we drive on the freeway. My problem is that I pay attention to EVERYTHING. Even if Seani mentions something in passing months before the actual date, I will remember and figure it out.

When we leave work, all I know is to bring a jacket and that we’re going to LA. On the way, I needed to stop by the store and my phone was almost dead so I instinctively pick up Seani’s phone to look up directions. I forgot there could be spoilers on the phone and I see the destination, the El Capitan Theater. I tried so hard to not find out and I start having a battle in my head. Should I tell Seani that I saw? Should I just pretend like I didn’t see and act surprised? Eventually I just blurt it out because I’m really bad at lying. Seani smiled, “I knew you’d see it.” Meanwhile I’m like “Why did you have it up?!” only to find out that it was on purpose. It actually was not our destination, just near it. Seani threw me off on purpose. Good one. You got me.

We get to the parking structure and I still don’t know what we’re doing. We walk up some exterior stairs to the rooftop of a building. It’s an outdoor movie theater. We get our headphones and blankets and head to our seats. As we wait for the movie to begin, I take in the nearby sights of LA and we talk about the buildings we can see from the roof. At this point there’s nothing to indicate what movie is playing. Seani hands me a bag of Reese’s Pieces. I love anything Reese’s. They make such good candy. I take this as a sign that Seani’s just being attentive to which candies I like.

The movie begins. It’s E.T. For anyone who hasn’t seen the movie, Reese’s Pieces are the candy that are featured towards beginning of the movie. It was fun to snack on Reese’s Pieces while seeing them on screen. All in all it was a perfect night getting to be in the big city, under the night sky, and getting to be cozy with the one you love and blankets watching a great movie.

Erika wrote a post! :)

A few weeks ago, Seani, Angela, Afra and I went on a girls day out to Solvang. I love Solvang, and I can say the biggest reason I love it there is the first time I ever went there was with Seani! Seani definitely knows the cool things to do there. I drove over to Seani and Angela's apartment at around 11am and the first thing I noticed was Angela's outfit. She was wearing a mustard yellow sweater with penguins on it, rubber yellow boots, and she even had a penguin umbrella to match her sweater and it was thoroughly adorable. We went and picked up Afra, who I had met once before and was excited to get to know a little better.

The drive out was beautiful and followed the ocean for most of the way there. Our first stop was one of my favorite places that I remember from the last time we went out there. We took a short hike on a beautiful trail to Nojoqui falls. The hike there takes about 20 minutes, is covered in poison oak, and has no water due to the drought - but it's very green and beautiful! My favorite part is when Angela took out her Polaroid camera to have somebody take a picture of all of us by the waterfall, and Afra literally squealed! I don't think she had seen one before and I haven't ever seen somebody that excited about a Polaroid in my life. I honestly wanted to buy one for her on the spot.

Next, we drove to my second favorite place in Solvang. The first time I went to the tiny pony farm, I had a laughing fit so hard that I had tears streaming down my eyes. I didn't know that mini ponies existed and they were pretty much the cutest and funniest little dog sized horses ever! We took a few pictures of the ponies until it started pouring rain and we ran to the car.

We drove into the town, which is designed to look and feel like a small town in Denmark. There are flowers and wooden windmills everywhere, and the stores are filled with Christmas decorations, Danish deserts, and cafés. It was around lunch time and we were looking for food. As we were outside deciding where to go, a woman in black overalls abruptly stopped Angela on the sidewalk and asked her if she got her penguin sweater at modcloth, which she did. She spoke so fast that we didn't even know what was happening, and as she walked away we realized that she had said that she was the fashion director at Modcloth and she was excited to see somebody wearing the color mustard. Now, you may not know how big of a fan Angela is of Modcloth. If she could, she would probably buy out the store. After we fully comprehended what had just happened, and did a two minute Google search for pictures of the fashion director at Modcloth, we realized that we needed to find this woman and actually talk to her instead of staring at her blankly. Unfortunately, she had basically instantly disappeared as soon as she said the word mustard. Seani, Angela, Afra and I split up and frantically ran around the building looking for her, and within a minute, Afra spotted her behind the building crossing the street. We chased after her and let Angela have her moment! They talked a little about Angela's love for Modcloth, how they were opening up a store in LA, and she snapped a picture of the two of them and we parted ways.

We all got some lunch at a mediocre cafe, and got some desserts at a yummy bakery just before the town started closing down. The drive home was beautiful with on and off rain. We found a giant bridge to take more Polaroid pictures at, and headed home! It was a lovely day :)

Now It's Personal

Most know the more you let someone in the easier it is for them to hurt you, but why is this? I'm sure you have seen those movies where someone says "this just got personal" and then they have some duty to avenge someone or something. Normally whatever it is they would willingly risk everything else for. It's the things we care about that make us emotionally vulnerable. However if you ceased to care you would be in a constant state of apathy.

OK. Yes, there are a lot of people that will take information about you and use it for gossip or worse. Having a close friend is a double edged sword. But the world is a very dangerous place and having a sword at all is an important asset. Most people have a lot of acquaintances and very few close friends (if any) and most accept this as part of life. I don't think people realize how important confidants are. People feel special when you show them you think about them. I know when you're out and about and just text me about something you saw it really brightens my day. But it's even better when it's about something I like, this makes it personal. 

If people didn't care about anything they wouldn't have purpose. They would be destined to walk the earth with no direction what so ever. There is no way around caring; it's a necessity for your overall heath. Caring about something with someone else adds support. But being someone that someone else cares about almost shoots magic energy everywhere! Insecurities melt away and you feel the importance of just being you.  This is because things mean more when they are personal, and in my experience the more personal a friendship the better. 

Unless you're looking at a Monet painting, the farther you are from something the harder it is to see what's going on, or do anything about it. The more I know about my friends the more I think about them and the more personal I can be. My friends live subconsciously in the back of my mind and are pulled forward with every color, sound or sensation I experience. I am always available to my friends to tell me anything and everything. It's a simple equation, the more I know the closer and better of a friend I can be. When you are sad I know why and I can be more likely to say or do the right thing.

People have always told me I'm really good at giving gifts. This is why.  Find out everything you can about your close friends. Friends can seem really close and the second something bad happens in their lives they close up. I need you to know I want to be an important part of your life. I plead with you to never shut me out.

The legend of Horsetail Fall

This blog post is about our Horsetail Fall adventure. Angela, Erika, And I went to Yosemite this last weekend with a mission in our hearts. That mission was to photograph something many only dream of seeing. For two weeks in February and if the weather conditions are just right, the setting sun illuminates the waterfall, making it glow orange and red. This natural phenomenon is often referred to as the "Firefall".

We packed up and left early Saturday morning and took the State Route 99. It was so green with flowers everywhere. Most of the almond trees were in bloom. We really felt like we were driving though Switzerland or some lush far off land. We really were not expecting a spectacle before we arrived in Yosemite Valley. This was truly a trip that exceeded expectations at every corner.

For those that don't know about Yosemite National Park it is within California’s Sierra Nevada Mountains. It’s famed for its giant, ancient sequoias, and for Tunnel View, the iconic vista of towering Bridalveil Fall and the granite cliffs of El Capitan and Half Dome. In Yosemite Village are shops, restaurants, the Yosemite Museum and the Ansel Adams Gallery.

We however had one main goal in mind, the Firefall! So when we arrived in the valley we went straight there. We arrived 4 hours before sunset and there were already photographers from all around set up to try their hands at a perfect shot of the falls. We laid out our picnic blanket and set our cameras on our tripods as the anticipation set in. Clouds started rolling in and fear that our goal was unattainable rolled in with it. However just as the sun was in position the clouds dispersed and the magic of the falls shown though.

Photo credit Angela Needham

It's amazing how perfect everything was from being so blessed with traveling with my gorgeous wife and an amazing friend like Erika, to the luck of being at the right place at the right time for a truly majestic sight so few get to witness. But our trip was not done yet we checked into our cabin and went out for some night photography in the park.

Photo credit Angela Needham

Our Perfect Disney Valentines Day.

Photo credit Angela Needham from our room balcony.

I am always looking for things to prove to my wife that I'm madly and deeply in love her and that she's the most important ever. That said, we did Disneyland the right way this weekend. I can't imagine anyone being able to have a better experience than we did. If I could give her the best thing I could think of... It would be this trip again.

The paramount thing in my life is spending time with my wife. I treasure every second I get with her. When I'm with my wife I'm happier and better for it. So it works out that this happens every day! We wake up together, go to work together, and talk about our day together. I take care of her and she takes care of me in return. We use endearments, have special jokes, and reminisce about special memories. In a way we have created our own magical world of romantic closeness.

First for Valentine's Day we checked in to our park view suite at the Disneyland Grand Californian Hotel and Spa. The view from our room was amazing only second to how truly breathtaking Angela is as she puts on her red lips, black eyeliner, black and red dress and her black and red sparkly Mickey ears.

Angela and I go to Disneyland quite a bit and have even had hotels nearby but none of them even come close to the convenience of being a few steps away from the action. That we could go back and take a shower midday like it was no big deal was an invaluable experience. It was also fun to people watch people in the park from our room. But what was really the crowning achievement that this hotel had to offer us was...

We had reservations at the Rainforest Cafe but with a private balcony with a wonderful view of the World of Color presentation, we decided it would be much better to have room service and eat on our balcony. The food was exquisite, the view was divine, and the company was second to none.

The next day I took Angela over to ticketing, tears filled her eyes when I bought us two Signature passes for another full year of Disney. Our old passes where set to run out that day and she was coming to terms with taking a break from Disneyland. Even she didn't know how happy it would make her to have our passes renewed. We can't wait for our new Disney adventures to come.

Useless

A clean home and a clean mind.

Angela and I have been run ragged trying to get everything done. Angela and I have been really busy working and trading off being sick. We finally got our butts in gear did our taxes and on Saturday cleaned our apartment (which is now a certifiable mess again.) We have amazing Valentine's Day plans that will be something special; and something we've needed for a while. So I'd read my next blog if I were you.

As for what we've been up to, we bought a high resolution photo scanner and have started archiving our lives. Even though it is a top of the line scanner it still takes time to scan each photo into the computer so we will do other things and when ones done we will switch it out for another. One thing's for sure; Angela was always such a cutie!! :3

I love that I never feel let down. Angela is always there for me. We realize that each other are our highest priority. It makes me so happy to never have to feel unimportant or useless.

It's like the story of the starfish.

We always know even though we can't help everyone or sometimes we can't do much of anything we are making a difference in each other's lives by simply loving each other.